A man’s heart deviseth his way; but the Lord directeth his steps. – Proverbs 16:9

Over the years I’ve spent a lot of time thinking over the paths we take in life. Or those we do not take.

I think that if we were honest, these conversations we have within ourselves regarding how we should live cause a lot of problems. Worse yet, the thoughts we have about how those whom we love should live cause even greater contention.

The greatest decision we make every day is how we spend our time, our energy, our precious moments.

No matter how far we journey in life, we are constantly weighing this out. Are we satisfied with the paths we have taken? How far does this road go, and will it take me where I want to go?

Perspective is the bridge from the past to the future which is needed to keep ourselves grounded in the present.

Consider thyself to be dead, and to have completed thy life up to the present time; and live according to nature the remainder which is allowed thee. – Meditations Book VII.56

When I read this passage from Marcus Aurelius I had to really think about what he was saying. I had to consider how I’ve lived my life up to this current time. And if it were finished, am I satisfied? Did I live according to God’s path for my life? Did I live according to my own nature?

So much of my energy and my time has gone into my career. Yes, this is necessary to support my family. But at what cost? Yes it was needed to develop my talents and build decades of experience, but to what greater good? How much of the need for success was simply ego? What did I prove or accomplish? Who will remember it?

That which I am certain of is what I would do differently. I would have been home more. I would have hugged my wife more. I would have prayed more. Spent more time with my kids. Done more to help those less fortunate in this life. I would have worried less about most things, since most of the things we choose to worry over do not matter.

More importantly I would have spent less time worrying about what others were doing with their time or attention, or about what was expected of me. Because what we truly need as humans is not for others to bend to our will, but for others to choose to be with us, to love us. How much less stress would I have had, or caused, if I had understood this. We are to love others the way Christ loved us – unconditionally and before we loved Him. And like Christ, we must wait for others to choose to have a relationship with us, to choose to want to be with us.

And of course I would have fished more. Spent more time with my dogs. Spent more time on a horse.

Now I see my young adult children navigating these same paths. Trying to find their Way. Worrying over what others choose. Trying to sort out what is truly important.

In my mind, life is like a trout stream. Sometimes tranquil, sometimes torrid. Yet beautiful and complex. The key is not to fight it. To catch wild trout you have to be deliberate, fully engaged in the moment, you must see the details, you must consider the presentation, and the drift must be seamless. You must join the nature of the stream, not disrupt it.

Ponder the path of thy feet, and let thy ways be established. – Proverbs 4:26

Live according to thy nature. Spend your moments deliberately. Don’t worry about what others do or think. Seek what brings quiet to your life. And pursue the Way God has ordered before you.